Honeymoon and Keeping in Touch

Once you’ve decided on your honeymoon destination, begin arranging for those responsibilities you’re going to leave behind. Are there young children you expect to be looked after by mum or mum-in-law? Don’t assume she will be able to do it, or even that she will want to. Ask first. No one likes to be taken for granted.

Similarly, don’t wait till the last minute to look for someone willing to water your plants, look after your pets, collect your mail, visit your empty house from time to time.

If you have any regular financial commitments, either ask someone to look after it,  or arrange with the bank for an automatic withdrawal.  Although in many places internet facilities will be available, worrying about bills is the last thing you need while you’re away.

It is unlikely that while you’re away anything is going to happen to you, or to those you leave behind. But it is always wise to be prepared for the unlikely. So leave with a family member or a close friend you can rely on, your expected honeymoon itinerary including name and phone numbers of resort or hotels you’re staying at, photocopies of passports, visas, credit cards and travellers’ check receipts.

Make also copies of these documents for yourself and your partner, so that if you’re unfortunate to loose the originals you will still have the copies. Never allow anyone, including those in authority, to take and keep your original documents. Either get them to make copies of the original, or offer them the copies you’ve made for yourself.

You’re encouraged to make out a will when you get married, and, in particular change an old one if you already have a will. Place the will, together with life insurance policy numbers and financial information, in a sealed envelope and leave that with a relative or friend.

If you have too many responsibilities to allow you to throw away your phone for the duration of your honeymoon - perhaps you’re leaving behind your children or elderly parents - check to see how and if your phone can be used in that particular part of the world. It could be that you might need to rent a phone there, rather than use your own.

You will have particular concerns if this is your second marriage and there are his, hers, and their children to consider. In particular, you will need to take into account the children's own reaction to your new marriage. Depending on their ages, and their disposition, the children’s reactions might be anything from sheer joy to sheer dread. In particular if they are young they might feel frightened at the idea that they are no longer the focus of your life.

Some couples choose to defer their honeymoon till a later date when they feel the family has blended. Others take the children on the honeymoon itself, fearing that otherwise the children might feel abandoned. Others still might have a couple of days, or a week on their own, and then send for the children to join them.

If, however, your decision is to have the honeymoon on your own, but you are concerned that the children are not as happy about it as you would like them to be, do all you can to keep in touch, including ring them frequently, email them daily, send postcards or photographs from the different localities you’re visiting, or even make videotapes or audiotapes and send them to your children.

 And lastly, if there’s some special occasion coming up in the near future, promise your children that you will take them to that special game, or special movie, or throw them a slumber party or whatever it is that will turn them on. Leaving them with something to look forward to will give them less time to worry about your absence.